Comments on: Who Should Know About Coda/Koda?

By: Colleen

Colleen — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 19:33:26 +0000

WOW
So many wonderful posts regarding the experiences as a Coda/Koda. Each post brought a thought to my mind and related to an event that happened in my childhood. I have never been to a Coda Conference, due to the location of where I am at, although I have always wanted to go.
However I am fortunate in that I have maintained close friendships with my Coda buddies from childhood and there is a fairly large groups of us around in our city. For those that have moved away to other parts of the country, we have still kept in touch.
I often wonder if other Codas felt closer to the Codas from their childhood than their own cousins or extended family members (who are not Codas or whom never took the time to learn the langauge).
I find that I struggle with establishing my role with my extended family and I do not have what I consider an indepth relationship with them. I am far more comfortable acting as the interpreter in the family gatherings than I am making small talk with them… despite the constant encouragement from the folks for me to NOT be the interpreter. But my relationship with my extended relatives although pleasant is a superficial relationship.
When I get together with the Coda buddies -to me they are my extended family. Perhaps it is the like experiences that bond us… or life long memories we share…. or both.
Anyway those are some thoughts that I wanted to share.

By: codadiva

codadiva — Tue, 17 Jul 2007 15:57:09 +0000

Jessica,
Good point. I’d be interested in a response too. Thanks for bringing it up.
Lisa

By: Jessica

Jessica — Tue, 17 Jul 2007 15:50:17 +0000

I have two KODAs and my son will start 2nd grade this fall. In kindergarten one of his homework assignments was to give me a summary of a story his teacher read to his class and I would write down his words and his thoughts about the story and send back to his teacher. It sometimes was challenging because there were some new words that he haven’t learned the signs for yet and I had to figure out what he was trying to say. I asked his teacher if I could borrow the books so I could read the story to get an idea and know what words to expect from him. Then in 1st grade books were sent home with him and he read them to me and then I sign off and he brought them back. Again he would learn signs for new words.

I explained to his teachers that my son switches between two languages at home and school and he is still learning to read English and then translate into ASL for me. His teachers so far have been understanding.

Wonder if any had experiences with this type of situation and how they handled it? Would like some ideas since school will be starting again soon.

By: codadiva

codadiva — Mon, 16 Jul 2007 11:10:22 +0000

LaRonda,
Thank you for sharing. Yes, it’s fascinating how we learn as children. This is exactly why hearing people that have an influence on our children need to know about these things. Your story was wonderful. I think teachers need to have this knowledge at least in a file for when they encounter a Coda as a student.

Great point!
Lisa

By: LaRonda

LaRonda — Mon, 16 Jul 2007 05:51:07 +0000

I’m glad you brought up that KODA kids are visual. This is true of my son. he is a visual and kinesthetic learner. I believe this is a result of using signs and facial expressions with him since his birth.

When he was in pre-school, we had a regular parent/teacher conference where we learned our son’s strengths were through visual and tactile learning. At the same time, we found an opportunity to educate the teachers about a KODA family dynamic that they had wondered about.

Apparently, our son would tap the teacher, or call out her name over and over until she looked at him, even if she answered him. If she wasn’t looking at him, he kept saying her name or tapping, even though she was listening. It drove her bonkers!

We explained how eye contact in our home was essential and that conversation did not begin or continue of eye contact was not given or broken. So by educating the teachers to give our son eye contact instead of just a verbal response while looking away, he would feel engaged and ready to communicate.

They began to practice it and things went much smoother for all.

Thanks for sharing your tips. Keep them coming.

~ LaRonda

By: codadiva

codadiva — Sun, 15 Jul 2007 22:40:31 +0000

Kim,
If only you could know how your words touch my heart. I appreciate my knowledge of being a more sensitive person by knowing two worlds. Thank you for the support. If only one vlog could reach out, then I have met my goal.

Thank you for sharing something special as your story.

By: Kim

Kim — Sun, 15 Jul 2007 22:10:20 +0000

My mom was CODA. She also worked at the Deaf school for 30 yrs as a Dorm parent. Raising me as her Deaf daugther and my brother (hearing), she really was fortunate having Deaf parents. It obviously expanded her world knowledge & views of the life in both worlds. I was also forunate having her as my mom because she spent time talking to me about the real life out there (hearing and Deaf). I appreciate my 40 years with her. I wish she could view your Vlogs and the Olson brothers’ Vlogs. Thank you very much for doing this!

By: Jonathan Lewis

Jonathan Lewis — Sun, 15 Jul 2007 21:08:27 +0000

Hey Codadiva, that’s hysterical when I read your response to Barinthus’s comment. You thought your husband was a hearing man staring at your group. Priceless! Really great vlog, too. It was educational and thought-provoking.

About the number of CODAs in the US, I’m curious to the number of CODAs that are involved with the deaf community on a daily basis because I know there are some CODAs who shun away from the deaf culture

I had a CODA interpreter in high school. She was great. She helped me get through the tough times where I was misunderstood and “different” from them.

CODAs ROCK! I love you all CODAs!!

By: codadiva

codadiva — Sun, 15 Jul 2007 15:49:38 +0000

Barinthus,
Absolutely! I agree, Coda issues are not being talked about. Also, it’s funny, my husband and I agree, I am more Deaf than he is. I have a bit of a louder, brash, attitude. In fact when I first met him, I thought he was some hearing guy staring at our group of singers. It’s a good thing I didn’t sign something negative.

To all, thanks for all the support.

By: Barinthus

Barinthus — Sun, 15 Jul 2007 07:42:03 +0000

I’m glad you brought this up. I’ve always felt that CODAs/KODAs are somewhat neglected in terms of how much we (society) study them. Hearing people are being studied all the time as well as Deaf people – there are tons of research on them both but I don’t see much on C/KODAs.

I’ve always have been aware of the fact that C/KODAs form an unique community/culture. We should be talking about them more especially that most Deaf parents are likely to have hearing children than deaf children.

Also, personally, some of my favorite people are CODAs themselves. I think it’s because while we both have different experiences, I feel we can understand each other being from families unlike ourselves (hearing parents for me, deaf for them). They can communicate with their parents and I can with my parents who thankfully can sign. In a way my CODA friends have more of the “Deaf Experience” growing up while I have had more of the “Hearing Experience” but I’m Deaf and they’re hearing, at least physically.

Looking forward to what comes out of this dialogue!